do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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