I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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