Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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