I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Randomize
