Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
