Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
