if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
