I like my sex mixed with concussions.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
