i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
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