just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
