Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Randomize
