So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I cut my penus on the lid.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
