That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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