Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???

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(734): View more from Michigan

I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.

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(912): View more from Georgia

I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong

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(703): View more from Virginia

protesters in toronto definately have the best pot

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(815): View more from Illinois

im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean

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(313): View more from Michigan

It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.

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(586): View more from Michigan

Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus

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(937): View more from Ohio

are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.

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