remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
i out mim tonsoeep
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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