I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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