nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
