so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
