you turned your livingroom into a bong?
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize