YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
