Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
