How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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