how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
