Dual....:-)
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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