A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Randomize
