I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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