Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Randomize
