Fine. I'll sleep in my office
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
