I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
