Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
