I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize