I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
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