lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
