You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
