you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize