1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
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