I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
