So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
