Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
