FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
You left your underwear on the fireplace
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
