Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
