we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
