i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
