it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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