all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
