Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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