check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
