doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
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