people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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