i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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